Based on the yin/yang love/hate principle, I've devised my own angryromancegrrl list of gifts to send to the man in your life.
Pictures
LOVE: A hot picture of YOU, framed in a non-girly frame. A little cleavage if you have it. Show your legs. Something that he'll appreciate and want to show off to his friends.NOTE: Do NOT send a half-naked picture of yourself with your hoo-ha flashing for all the world to see. First of all--NO ONE wants to see that and second, if you break up. it will be on the Internet. Really. Don’t make me say it again.
HATE: Send him/her a picture of yourself with someone else
NOTE: I've done this. I dated a guy for quite a while and we broke up. A few months later (after I moved to another state) he called to say he missed me and would I send a picture. I sent him a picture of myself and the guy I was dating at the time. I made sure we both looked uber-hot. I never heard from him again.
Candy
LOVE: Personalized M&M's: 8 characters per line and an array of colors. You can tell someone who much you love them. Want them. Etc. AND you can say it with chocolate. How cool is that?HATE: Sadly, they will NOT let you swear on an M&M. Sigh. So no 'fun' phrases like 'Bite Me'' or "Fuck Off'. Pity. But if you are not feeling the love this Valentines and want to say it with candy, go check out the Bittersweets at despair.com. There are 3 kinds Dejected. Dysfunctional. Dumped. All have 37 sayings that are…shall we say…bitter! Hence the name. My favorite? Peaked at 17. Ouch!
Letters
LOVE: One of the best gifts you can give someone is telling them how you feel about them in a letter. Don't get too gushy but let him know he matters. A little. Even macho dudes like to know that you want to spend the holiday with them--not just a random someone.HATE: Take all the letter, cards, etc that he gave you, tear them up, burn them and send them back. Make sure pieces are legible so he knows what you sent. Add glitter for that 'ha ha ha fuck you' feeling.
Jewelry
LOVE: Nothing says love like something shiny. I like diamonds. Emeralds. Rubies are good. And if some man needs an excuse to give me the sparkly treats, I am all over it! I prefer bracelets for anyone who caresHATE: Sell the sparklies and buy yourself a nice trip to Greece. Hook up with the hot pool boy. Send pictures.
3 comments:
Alas, my Valentine and I have gotten into a terrible rut (as opposed to the *good* kind of rut). Perhaps it's time for a "special" picture. Or better yet, the M&Ms. At least with the chocolate I can get some kind of satisfaction when he's out of town. Actually, I guess I can do that with or without the chocolate ;)
*blink blink* What? TMI?
(feel free not to post this comment)
You wish I'd let it go. nope--you're so POSTED! Bwahahahaha
No, *I* wish you'd let it go :)
Oh well. Serves me right.
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